Jaded. Fragmented. Fallen.
Always Rising.

Sunday, January 8, 2006
07:23 p.m.
unlovable,
i've deemed myself to be

the trials of waves
wash over me

i just want to forget. . .

let this nightmare cease to be...

the mirror,
that gurl

that isn't me...

she laughs,
is happy...

smiles

me. . .
i hurt
i cry

i crave desperately to find beauty. . .

the binds that longing brings,
the unfulfillment
of the empty nights
where the candles doesn't shed any light

only scarlet tears.
-alysia-

Sunday, January 8, 2006
07:21 p.m.
anxiety
i'm left clutching
the heart
that once was not myne
but yours.
like everything of myne.
how do you expect me to keep
breathing
if it was only you that was
allowed
breath?
how do you expect me to smile
when it was you that
left?
-alysia-

Sunday, January 8, 2006
07:19 p.m.
you look at me
as if you don't relize
who i am.
have i really changed
since you left?
i think not,
maybe i've grown stronger
and my scars
are no longer fresh,
but time can heal
any wound,
and you no longer
dig deep
into my sanity.
For it is you
that abandoned
the young dreams
of a life to be loved
once again.
-alysia-

Sunday, January 8, 2006
07:15 p.m.
waiting,
the time, apparently, precious
but i have nothing else.
the laughter-
a time spent in the sun
after so much darkness-
so much love.
but you,
the wind-
the spring's dance.
happy,
i grew to be
young,
the timing off
steady me-
your hand,
the foundation for my soul.
melt the thorns,
you dared.
venturing,
every day
different.
still, you stayed
even
comforted me-
leading me away from
the edge.

but now,
you turn.
i suddenly become too much
to handle.
the light too much
it blinds me
confusion,
how did i get here?
the scars
now plain-
blood released from the eyes
that used to shine.
unbearable,
i belong no where here.
step back-
i know not you-
appeared a stranger
and then just
darkness.
darkness
and crushed roses-
foolish to ever have
believed you.
-alysia-

Sunday, January 8, 2006
03:08 p.m.
Agony
the heat rises
and you're left
with the sweat
of not passion
but grief
never again
you used to swear
but all he had to
was say
once again,
and the feelings would
come back.
back to those arms
which used to strangle-
choke
out all the air...
all of me.
-alysia-

Sunday, January 8, 2006
03:06 p.m.
the cries of the unheard
are echoed through my mind
they tell of horrors,
of pains...of loves...
they scream
telling me more
crying out until blood.
anguish and disdain from this world
seep through my eyes...
allowing my mind's eye to create
swirls upon reality
and the blood will never return-
your innocence long forgotten.
-alysia-